CLUTTER NUTTERS

We launch our company this month so wanted to let the NHM community know all about us.

We are a home organisation/de-cluttering service and offer the following services currently;

  • Organising any room(kitchen, lounge, bedrooms, study, playroom, cellar, conservatory
  • Within a room (cupboards, shelves, clothes etc)
  • Whole house
  • Sheds, garages and garden storage units
  • Storage containers
  • Playgroups/Nurseries

For further details please see our website or facebook page.

We also offer vouchers and 10% discount for returning customers.

https://www.facebook.com/TheClutterNutters/

www.clutternutters.com

Thanks Lisa & Emma J

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Mumsmissingmums

Mumsmissingmums is a new, support network for those mums who are raising their children without the support of their own mums.

A closed group of women who would like a safe place to chat, share stories and get to know others in the same position with meeting up too if people want to.

It isn’t just for women who have lost their mums to bereavement, it is for all women for whom their mums are absent from their lives.

Please feel free to search for the group on facebook and request to join.

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Vocal Point Youth Choir

Vocal Point is a new youth choir starting up at The Point, Tadley on Wednesday 21st February.

Set up by the founders of successful Mum’s choir, Ooh Mama, it promises to be a fun, dynamic and exciting musical adventure for youngsters in Tadley and surrounding areas.

The sessions are initially being run as a project from 21st February to the Easter holidays to gauge interest, if successful, Vocal Point will become a permanent activity on offer to Years 6 – 13 at The Point.

There is a minimal cost of £1 per session, held at the fantastic facilities at The Point in Tadley, a purpose built youth centre.

The point bosts a large hall with fabulous acoustics, access to musical instruments and a recording studio.

If your child would like to join Vocal Point contact thepoint@tadleycommunitycentre.org.uk or visit The Point Tadley’s Facebook page.

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Review 2018: West Green Fruits

Thank you very much to today’s NHM Secret Reviewer!

West Green Fruits review – pick your own fruits, Hartley Wintney

West Green Fruits

 

One of my friends had recently told me about how she had asked her little boy where strawberries come from, he answered “the supermarket” (he was a little more specific but I didn’t want to seem bias!)

As it happened, I had already heard of a place called West Green Fruits where you can pick your own produce, and my friend’s experience made me keen to try it out! I had never been to a PYO before, I had been blackberry picking in ‘the wilds’, but I was really intrigued by this and thought it would be a great introduction to where food comes from. My boys were 2.5 yrs so I was a little concerned they would be a bit too young to get it. Fortunately, I was very wrong.

About

West Green Fruits is situated just outside Hartley Wintney, about 15 minutes from central Basingstoke. They are open during the PYO season, which started on 10th June this year. It is a family run business set in 20 acres of farmland and offers a range of fruit including strawberries, raspberries, rhubarb, gooseberries, tayberries and more. There is a small shop selling their own homemade jams and Jella’s Ice Cream, made with their produce. They also have produce ready picked for those who would rather not pick their own.

The area consists of a car park, small building and acres and acres of fields. It is a stunning setting. There is also a picnic area and grass labyrinth, although we didn’t get to see these. You collect your punnets from the building by the car park. This is also where you bring back your produce to weigh and houses the shop. The produce currently available for picking are displayed on a board and the lovely ladies – and I do mean lovely, so helpful and chatty with the little ones too – point you in the direction of where to go.

It was wonderful to see both my boys happily trotting along, excitedly carrying their punnets, following the trail. The available fields are well marked out and there was an abundance of fruit to pick. Amazingly both my boys loved the experience, carefully picking out each fruit. I say amazingly as one of my boys is not very good at standing still, so to see him delicately choosing and picking each piece of fruit was incredible. After quite some time we wandered back to the kiosk to pay, and definitely needed to deposit into the ‘sin bin’ (an honesty box for ‘lost’ fruit and the contents going to charity) – red streaked faces making that pretty obvious!

We’ve been twice now, strawberries then raspberries, and will definitely be going back soon before the season ends.

Tips

West Green Fruits is seasonal, you will need to keep an eye on the West Green Fruits Facebook Page for their opening dates and for the produce that is currently available. Current opening hours are also displayed there.

Facilities

Worth noting, there are no facilities on site.

Prices

You pay for what you pick, prices are available at the kiosk and based on weight.

I think this is brilliant, as the picking is an experience in itself yet all you are paying for is the produce.

Rating out of 5

5, totally unique experience that we all loved.

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NHM Readers: What I would buy if i was doing it all again!

I recently asked the Friends of  my “Louise nhm Smith” profile on Facebook what they would buy or not buy if they were to have another baby based on their experiences (Thank you very much to everyone who responded!)

These were the responses I received. They are in no particular order

NHM Readers: What would I buy or not buy if I was to do it all again?

Mindy said: I probably wouldn’t bother with a breastfeeding pillow as we encourage mums to lean back now and you don’t need a pillow for that. Also you may not need a breast pump, wait and see and buy if needed. Ditto with steriliser.

Jessica said: I wouldn’t bother with a breast pump, electric bottle warmer, cot duvet and bumpers, a pram that doesn’t have a car seat adapter, baby carrier/harness or millions of outfits in newborn or 0-3 months. I would buy again an electric steriliser, bottle warming flask, sleep pods/sleeping bags, pram system with car seat adapters.

Mary said: I would buy a proper sidecar cot and would buy a proper sling or find out about the sling library to see what was best.

Kathryn said: I had my 3rd baby 8 months ago, after my second we got rid of everything except the cot and car seat. Before my youngest was born we bought a new sling and got given some clothes. Nothing else was needed.

Donna said: If bottle feeding, the Tommee Tippee Perfect Prep is one that I wish I had now and definitely pushchair with car seat attachments.

Shona said: I wouldn’t buy a fancy swing or rocker as he barely used it. I would stick with my Perfect Prep machine every time. I wouldn’t buy a bath seat again but I love my bath sponge that you just lay them on and they stay in one place.

Colleen said: Wouldn’t bother with car seat adaptors as barely used them, and you’re not supposed to leave baby in car seat for longer than necessary anyhow. Nappy bin is a waste of time, just use nappy bags. Change table would have been pointless as all mine moved so much it wasn’t safe to change them past floor height from about 4 months.

Jenni said: Ikea high chair is the best, easy to clean and can get an insert for little babies.

Wendy said: Best buys: Good quality stroller (worth spending money here), Morrck blanket, Ikea high chair, side crib, sling. Worst buys: New travel system (buy them second hand) and anything that takes up space in your living room (rocker chairs, rocking horses etc).

Mary said: Don’t bother with: shoes until they walk (couldn’t get the damn things on his curled up feet), faffy outfits in the first 3 months as you have to change them so often per day, stick to lots of baby gros! Gimmicky toys, they don’t take notice and you’ll be given loads as gifts anyway. Too many clothes in newborn size, in case you have a big baby and never end up using them, again you will be sent loads of clothes. Sit in walker.

Do get: Ikea or Baby Bjorn high chair that is completely wipe clean. All those ones with straps and padding get filthy and you shouldn’t need straps anyway as babies should be able to sit unaided before you wean. A good sling if you are having a second baby, they sleep for ages in them leaving you hands free. Set up a little changing station on both floors with mat/nappies/wipes so everything is to hand. We personally found nappy bins useful, don’t want to traipse out to the bin every 5 mins. If breast/mixed feeding, Medela bottles are great as baby needs to use same motion to drink helping you switch with ease. Grobags – no worrying about blankets etc. Monitor with a camera. Sock ons for no more lost socks.

Donna said: Yes to the sock ons – best buy ever!

Catherine said: Do get sling, zip up swaddle, side crib, ear thermometer, playmat/gym and video monitor.

Don’t get alarm for under mattress (unnecessary hateful thing), any body thermometer other than an earone, stupid light up egg room thermometer, highchair (there are some nice small ones that cost a bit, we got a high padded one which we never used after the first month as I replaced it with £20 one you attach to a chair) and any outfits in newborn that don’t button under nappy, they just ride up.

Jennie said: I’d buy a bath sponge seat, proper sling, cloth nappies and a baby swing. I wouldn’t bother with a side cot for the bed (it got used for storage whilst she slept in our bed), baby outfits, baby shoes, playmat or a change table. I have a bad back so getting upstairs to get to the changing table was as much of an issue as changing on my lap/floor.

Vicky said: Our best buys were the Baby Bjorn bouncer, a mothercare fabric bath support, a decent baby monitor/camera, lovely soft blanket for in and out of the pram, vests and sleepsuits. This may sound a bit strange but I bought puppy pads (cheap from TK Maxx) to put under his bum during nappy off time – they catch the urine and absorb it rather than laying on a wet towel. If you’re breast feeding I found the Lansinoh disposable nursing pads to be fantastic. I’d also buy a decent sling. Personally I wouldn’t bother with baby shoes, dribble bibs, baby outfits, fabric breast pads (just leaked straight through to clothes) and loads of cuddly toys.

Vicky said: Perfect prep is a genius if bottle feeding. Lots of muslins – I found M&S ones the softest and they wash well. Shnuggle baby bath is amazing – 2 free hands almost from birth. Aldi nappies are cheap and brilliant. Lots of babygrows, sleepsuits and vests for the first couple of months. Swaddles and then grobags – I find the Sainsbury’s ones the best.

Lisa said: Think most things I would suggest have been covered. My only addition is to not bother with special tummy time gadgets. Spent a lot of money on a Lamaze toy which was a complete waste of money! I think a good buggy is essential. I bought mine 2nd hand which was fine but chose cost over personal choice.

Gemma said: I’d get a baby sling from day one. I wish I’d got mine for baby number two earlier. I missed out the first few weeks of sling time!  
Wouldn’t bother with a Baby Bjorn as it hurt my back (let alone being bad for baby’s hips) Could manage without moses basket and pram part of a travel system. Only need one or the other, not both, especially if you get a buggy that lays flat for newborns which many do now.

Cerys said: All I needed for no 3 were nappies, a wrap sling, sleepsuits and boobs.

Melanie said: Best buys: Baby Bjorn bouncer (suitable from newborn and last years. Indestructible!) Oxo perfect pull wipes dispenser means you only need one hand to pull them out and keeps them moist. Cheeky wipes are great if your child suffers from nappy rash or you want something environmentally friendly. Monitor and webcam. Nappy bin. Ability to play music wirelessly in their bedroom (so you can put it on without going in). Jumparoo. Vtech Walker.
Don’t buys (based on things neither of my children liked): Crawl ball, door bouncer, sit in walker (but think it would be better on wooden or tiled floors)

Mata said: I would buy: Cot bed that can be used as a 3 sided bedside cot as well as a toddler bed. Nursing bras, breast pads, changing mat, wipes, nappy bin, sling, pushchair, car seat that attaches to pushchair, vest, sleepsuits, large hooded towels (still in use at age 5), sleeping bag and blanket.

Maybe: Moses basket (for daytime naps downstairs)

Wouldn’t bother: Baby bath, sponges/wash mitts, cute outfits, scratch mitts, playmat, bouncy chair/swing, standard cot, toys, lay-flat separate pram, feeding equipment, purpose-made changing bag and Bumbo seat.

Natashia said: Personally I would recommend a “try before you buy” approach where possible for example renting a sling or electric breast pump and attending sales for second hand bits where you can stock up on essentials for your baby’s next phase. For nappies sure Aldi, Lidl or own brands are cheaper but if you like the leading brands then keep a close eye on supermarket offers and shop around as it then works out to almost the same as own brands.

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Kath’s Online Relaxation

Kath from  Relax Kids, www.facebook.com/rkbasingstoke, asked me to join her online relaxation course recently and of course I JUMPED at the chance. Being someone who likes to fill her time (see how I refrained from using the word “busy”) a short relaxation course is exactly what I needed!

Kath sets up a secret group on Facebook that is open for a month (the duration of the course) and every day she posted a relaxation session first thing in the morning.

During the week the sessions are no more than 5 minutes long, which is great for busy “people who like to fill their time” people like me!

On the weekend Kath had some longer relaxation sessions which range from 30 minutes to 45 minutes.

You can also do the sessions as many times you like for the duration of the course.

You don’t have to do the activities on the same day, you can save them all up and do them in one day. I wouldn’t recommend this though as I got the most benefit from doing each session the day it was posted.

This is the beauty of the course, you can choose when YOU want to do the relaxation techniques. Most people say that you are supposed to do meditation in the morning but this isn’t always practical with busy family life. But with this course you can choose the best time for you.

I loved the breathing techniques, the visualisation, meditation and the focused sessions. I’m still using both the breathing techniques and visualisation now, three weeks later, even though I haven’t got access to the online course anymore! They are that simple that you don’t need to be prompted to remember.

Even if you are a guru at relaxation, sometimes it’s nice to have someone else remind you to stop and take a moment.

The course is only £10 and for that you get a daily relaxation session for a month.

I loved it so much that I’m paying to join the course next month. Definitely the best £10 I will have spent in a long time!!!

You can find more details at the following link: www.bookwhen.com/rkbasingstoke

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Yoga Babes: Five ways to calm a crying or tired baby

Today’s guest post is by Rosanna of Yoga Babes

Five ways to calm a crying or tired baby

One of the ways babies communicate with their parents and carers is by crying. When we hear that cry it can trigger different emotions for us such as sadness, frustration or even anger. It’s usually an adult’s natural instinct when they hear a baby cry to soothe and help the baby back to state of contentment, and to stop the crying.

I’m Rosanna, a mum of two under 5s and the instructor at Yoga Babes mother and baby Yoga in Hook, Hampshire. My children may cry (just a little!) less than they did when they were young, but I sure do remember those days well. I have been practicing yoga since before having my children, during pregnancy, labour and birth, and ever since. There are many yoga-based techniques that have changed my life as a parent, and outside of that. In this post I’m going to share with you five tips to calm a crying or tired baby that I’ve learnt through doing yoga, training as a baby yoga instructor and from my own experiences as a parent.

The challenge – it’s not always easy to know the reason for your baby’s cry, which can be upsetting and frustrating for parents. We have to try and remember that crying is a very normal part of a baby’s early years, and much like adults – all babies are different. Some babies will cry more than others, some babies will laugh more than others and some babies will sleep more than others. They are each beautifully different in their own unique way.

There are many reasons for a baby to cry including hunger, tiredness, boredom, loneliness, pain, feeling too cold or too hot or discomfort from things like wind or constipation.  

Whatever the reason for a baby crying, it’s important to remember the power of physical contact between babies and their parents or carer. Touch reduces stress levels for baby and parent, so holding your baby is a good place to start when they are crying, unsettled or overtired.

The first, perhaps obvious port of call would be checking if your baby is hungry, as that is one of the main reasons for a young baby to cry. It might not matter that you fed them one hour ago or even less, young babies are growing at such a rapid rate compared to the rest of their lives, so their hunger can be extremely regular and have no pattern whatsoever. Even though it can be tiring, feed your baby whenever they are hungry rather than trying to stick to a timetable, as this can cause unnecessary stress for both you and your baby.

Holding your baby

If a baby is fed and changed and there is no other known discomfort, a huge reason for babies to cry is because they want the comfort of being held. Some parents try to fight this fact – so it’s important to realise that after spending nine months being permanently held in your womb, it’s going to take a baby some time to gain independence. Perhaps weeks, perhaps months, or even years, but it’s fundamental for your baby’s emotional development that you support them carefully through this transition to living in the outside world. I know from my youngest son who needed to be held a lot, that it can be exhausting for parents to be attached to their babies for long periods of time, so see if you can get help from your partner, friends and family if you need some time out. Baby wraps, slings and carriers are also a great help so you can have your hands free – I couldn’t have lived without them! Try and enjoy these cuddles and this physical connection with your baby when you can, (rather than resenting it) because it doesn’t last forever.

Holding your baby gives them a deep sense of security, they can usually feel your heartbeat, your warmth, hear your voice and your breathing which is extremely reassuring for a small baby. There are many different ways to hold your baby, many of which we practice in my baby yoga class. Different holds can aid different needs, such as digestion, comfort and sleeping.

Movement

If you can move while holding your baby, all the better! I was so pleased when I found that I could settle my son’s 6pm (and 10pm, and 3am etc etc…!) cries by holding him or popping him in the baby wrap and walking around my lounge. Even though it was small, the little movement I could do by walking or simply rocking him side to side saved me hours of his crying if I had left him crying away from me. The movement can relieve stress for parents too, providing rhythm and mindfulness to relax the body and mind. In yoga we often use different types of walking for strength, balance, coordination and relaxation.

Singing

Even if you don’t agree, your singing voice is the best one there is as far as your baby is concerned! Singing is the perfect way to connect with your baby and release endorphins for babies and parents, which in turn relaxes them when they are feeling unsettled. Singing is also key for brain development in young babies and helps them with the early parts of language development. If your baby is crying because they are bored or frustrated, singing is a brilliant way to engage them and entertain them out of crying. It doesn’t matter what you sing – pop songs, nursery rhymes, lullabies or even (my favourite) – made up songs! Your baby is sure to love the sound of your soothing voice to settle them. In my baby yoga class, we usually use singing with movement which is a great combination to relax your baby and shift them towards a positive mood.

Physical activity

If you have a baby that gets overtired or cries at naptime or bedtime you might find that what you do with them during the daytime makes a big difference. Baby yoga moves are gentle movements you can do with your baby that involve strengthening their limbs, muscles and body, improve coordination and balance and stimulate your baby’s senses. Doing all of these things can make your baby to feel tired, helping them to feel relaxed, settled and fall asleep more easily.

Relaxation

This part is definitely for babies and parents or carers. Babies will pick up on our stress, sadness, frustration and anger and in turn may exhibit similar emotions that make them cry or become unsettled. When we relax it gives our minds the space and time to process emotions in an orderly fashion, rather than over-react to them. Physical relaxation can promote mental and emotional relaxation, and the great news is that you can practice relaxation with your baby, to benefit you both. I remember that when I had small babies, it was too easy to be in a continual cycle of ticking jobs off my list. Laundry, cleaning, tidying, sterilising bottles, responding to emails and messages, getting a changing bag ready for the next outing, even just trying to plan your day. The list goes on… But on reflection I asked myself some questions. How important is it to get ALL these things done today? What will happen if don’t? Do I feel at my best when I have a constant list of to-dos?  Are they more important than spending time connecting and bonding with my baby? Are they more important than spending ten minutes to relax and restore my body and mind before carrying on with the day? Maybe you can ponder your own answers to these questions.

No one is suggesting that you live in a pigsty and throw in the towel on any jobs whatsoever, but more that you aim to get some balance in your daily activities. We can do this by making time for relaxation. A result of your relaxed self will most likely be a relaxed baby by your side.

By doing a short relaxation exercise that involves focusing on your breathing, sounds, your bodily sensations or simply just lying still can create a luxurious feeling of calm for you and your baby. Try it lying with your baby, where they might focus on your touch, breath or heartbeat, or just mirror your stillness. This takes practice for babies too! It might be a good idea to try a relaxation half an hour before your baby’s planned bedtime or nap time, so that they have wound down before bed, rather than trying to do it a time when they’ve been become overtired and worked up.  If you get the chance, if someone else is around to watch your baby, try a relaxation on your own too and enjoy the peace and clarity it can bring you.

It’s important not to try and force a relaxed feeling as that can have the opposite effect, but by practising on focusing on our physical self or perhaps an idyllic visualisation, the relaxation can come naturally. There is no pass or fail here either, some days you may not be able to reach a feeling of relaxation – that’s ok, just try again tomorrow.

We practice relaxation in my baby yoga classes because for many (myself included) this is not always an easy activity to learn. But the more your practice the more you realise the need for this wonderful pastime and its life changing benefits – all you need is yourself.

I’m a Birthlight baby yoga teacher and I teach mother and baby yoga classes in Hook, near Basingstoke, Hampshire every Thursday morning. The class offers gentle yoga movements for mothers and babies aged 3-9 months. For more information visit www.yogababes.co.uk or email Rosanna@yogababes.co.uk

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Family/Junior activities at Basingstoke Sports Centre – Jan 2018

Eeek, I’m a teeny tiny bit late with this post but not too late for some of the courses which start this week. I’m sure Sarah would be able to accommodate you in you are interested.

Family/junior activities at Basingstoke Sports Centre

-Family Pedal (12.10-12.40) for parents and children, starting Saturday 6th Jan for six weeks

-Junior Pedal (4-4.45) for ages 10 and up, starting Wed 3rd Jan for six weeks

-Junior Bootcamp (4.25-5.25)  for ages 8 and up, starting Thursday and/or Friday 4th/5th Jan for six weeks

-Pre school Mini Movers (11-11.30) starting Wed and/or Thursday 10th/11th Jan for five weeks

I’m so passionate about young people’s health and fitness, as well as their parents!

I also run a class every single Wednesday evening at All Saints Church Hall 6-6.45, £5 a time (drop in) for adults to squeeze in a child free work out.

Thanks!
Sarah

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NHM Readers: Sticking out ears

I recently asked the Friends of  my “Louise nhm Smith” profile on Facebook if they could help with the following question: “My daughter is 3 years old and since a few months old has had ears that stick out quite extremely. Although this doesn’t bother her yet, I do worry that it will be a target for bullying once she starts school.

When I discussed with the doctor the option of having them pinned back, she was very dismissive and said that they would not do this until she was sixteen or if she started to get bullied and requested it herself. However bullying can have such long lasting effects on one’s personality that I’d rather not wait until it happens.

Has anyone else’s child had ears that stick out and what did they do about it?”

These were the responses I received. They are in no particular order

NHM Readers advice about sticking out ears

Caitlin said: I personally had my ears pinned when I was about six years old, though that was 18 years ago! I did get severely bullied and unfortunately surgery was not completely successful however I would say try and see a different doctor and get a second opinion as it is fairly straightforward so I can’t see why they would need to wait!

Stacey said: yeah why should she have to wait until she gets bullied!!

Lucy said: I was bullied at school for big sticky out ears, bugs bunny teeth with a large gap from thumb sucking, glasses and being overweight. It sucked. But I dealt with it, eventually stood up to my bullies and got on with it. It might not have been nice but it’s all part of what has made me who I am now and whilst I may still be fat, still have my grandads ears and a gap in my teeth (I took the decision at 13 not to fix that as it would affect my flute playing) I’m a strong enough person to not worry about it. Isn’t it better to teach our kids that bullying isn’t acceptable and to be strong and confident enough to stand up to it than to surgically fix a problem that might not happen?

Sue said: Think it would be viewed as cosmetic and so you would have to prove it affects confidence/ is a cause for bullying etc

Gail said: wait until nursery age and then go to doctors, lie if necessary about bullying. You must do what you think is best for your baby!!

Honor said: My ex niece had sticky out ears ,my ex brother and sister in law had the same worries they also went to the doctors and had same reply ,it landed up with them having to pay for them to be pinned back. Even when they said it was affecting her mentally they wouldn’t budge. So I suggest having to pay for it to be done whilst she’s young before it’s an issue.

Mata said: I wonder what the ‘pinning back’ involves? I would not expose my child to a procedure that is not medically necessary, unless the child fully understood what it involves and requested it him/herself. I think the doctor is right – even if what he/she’s said is not what the parents wanted to hear – exposing a child to surgery that is purely cosmetic does not sound ethical to me. I guess the parents can always go private if they wish.

Natashia said: This is a tough one but will share my personal experience. I had the same issue and had the surgery when I was 15. Getting it done through the NHS may be none unless they can assess that the issue is causing the child psychological distress. Even getting it done privately not sure what the process is in terms of consent to carry out cosmetic surgery on a minor. The thing I found wasn’t necessarily with bullying so much as the non-stop teasing which can really knock your self confidence and this was how it affected me.

As a teenager at the time it didn’t matter how pretty I tried to look there was always the dreaded ears which I always tried to cover with doing my hair in creative ways and I was convinced it will cause me issues into adulthood and affect things like relationships,career opportunities etc. Of course each of us have our own insecurities but if not managed or dealt with can cause long term issues like depression, some people can make peace with their insecurities but not everyone can but that does not make you weak. The operation was done by a fantastic plastic surgeon (it pays to do your homework here!) who did a great job, my parents could get it done for me through their private medical following a review on me by a psychologist. The operation involves a cut at the back of each ear and removal of cartilage then stitched back again. The recovery took a while, I walked with bandage around my head for about a week (or two) until they were happy for the stitches to come out. Then my ears were still quite blue,swollen and sensitive for another couple of weeks and it probably took another month or so to appear ‘normal’

Needless to say it was very painful as well through the recovery but overall it was a success. I also tried to keep the operation very quiet as I was scared of further teasing on that so planned it to happen over school holidays. But best thing my parents ever did for me I have no regrets. There were times I wished they just got it done for me when I was little but then again with anything cosmetic I strongly believe it should only be done when it is your own decision. My parents accepted and loved me for who I was and only acted upon my request, though it took Dutch courage for me to bring up the topic with them and they still tried to get me to accept myself as I were, but I couldn’t get past it and then they supported me through that. You want to do the best for your child of course but sometimes it can be hard not to reflect our insecurities as parents and assume our children will feel the same way. Good luck with your research and whichever decision you make.

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